Bible Breakdown...James 3:16

This is something I've been thinking about since Sunday night, and even more recently since yesterday: we as Christians should avoid strife at ALL costs. Why? The answer can be found in the book of James.

"For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work."

 - James 3:16 (KJV)

Brent and I volunteer with our church's altar care ministry, and one of our group leaders was teaching at our meeting Sunday night. He was encouraging us as volunteers in different areas, and began talking about the importance of walking in love at all times. He referenced this verse, stating that we as Christians ought to avoid strife at all costs because, as he put it, "when there's strife, there's the manifest presence of the devil." That really stood out to me - it gave me a lot to think about!

How often have I contributed to strife, without even considering it? How many times have I posted things on Facebook that I knew were controversial? How many times have I participated in (or even initiated) gossip? How many times have I been on a mission to prove how "right" I was? How many times have I contributed, in any way, shape or form, to strife? At home? At work? At church? With loved ones? Online? I can  pull out a few specifics from recent months (weeks...days), but I couldn't tell you how many times beyond those that I've been guilty of my fair share of strife-causing.

Thinking about this not only led me to repentance, but it also inspired me to dig a bit deeper into this particular verse and how it relates to on-purpose living. It's located towards the end of the well-known tongue-taming chapter (which is worth a read-through...and another one...and another), but I want to focus on this particular verse tonight.

(Please keep in mind: I am in no way, shape or form a Greek scholar, nor do I pretend to or want to be. I simply love to go a bit deeper in Bible study, and Blue Letter Bible helps me do that - check it out if you never have!)

"Strife" comes from the Greek word eritheia, which means, "a desire to put oneself forward." This word stems from another Greek word, erethizō, which means, "to stir up, stimulate, to provoke." Many other translations translate strife as "selfish ambition" or "selfishness." The Message translation of James 3:16 puts it perfectly: 

"Whenever you’re trying to look better than others or get the better of others, 

things fall apart and everyone ends up at the others’ throats." 

And that's what it really is, isn't it? Wanting to look better than others. We want to be right, to be superior, to promote ourselves. We try to cover it with an array of excuses (personality, self-confidence, "my personal opinion is," and so forth), but let's just call it what it is: pride! Plain and simple. We want our voice to be heard, in some way or another. (I may take "wanting my voice to be heard" a bit more literally than some.) The Message translation of this verse really hits home for me because this (pride) is one of my biggest problems! I've been guilty of trying to prove I'm right, of using my body language to let people know that I think they're inferior to me in some way, and of straight-up Pharisaism. 

Real Christlike, huh?

But what's the point of self-promotion as a Christian? Answer: there isn't one! No wonder everything falls apart when selfish ambition exists in the life of a believer - it's the exact opposite of what our purpose here is! It is always, always, always about HIM. His Kingdom. His glory. His people. His plan. His Word.

I have to remember that it's never, ever about me. I'm dead to myself - it's no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me! My personal opinions don't matter in the grand scheme of things. In fact, in my desire to live every day of my life on purpose - the purpose of sharing and spreading the Gospel of Jesus! - every day is an opportunity to grow more and more into the likeness of Christ, and that includes making His "opinions" mine. It includes walking in love at all times, and that means NEVER causing or engaging in strife! It means avoiding strife at all costs.

And yes...I absolutely believe it's possible to walk in love at all times. I believe it's absolutely possible to avoid strife at all costs! Is it easy to do? Not by ourselves it isn't! But that's the beauty - we don't ever have to do it by ourselves! I have LOVE HIMSELF...PEACE HIMSELF, living on the inside of me, and if you're a Christian, you do too!

Will we fail at this from time to time? Sure we will, because we're human. But we can grow, develop and increase in this area daily by spending time with Him, inviting Him into our day-to-day lives, and staying sensitive to His voice throughout our day.

Do that, and I guarantee you - it'll be more and more difficult to not walk in love as you grow up in Him!

Quit being so busy!

These last couple of weeks have been crazy busy full of...well, crazy busyness. 

And it's just not worth it! 

Life is too short, and there's too much to do to have so much to do, you know? All of my volunteering is great, but that on top of double portions of school, and still wanting to see my husband and the occasional friend, is just a lot. (Not to mention, I would like to write from time to time!) Even making sure I dedicate a solid portion of time to God each morning has been becoming a chore of sorts, and that's never OK. 

Like...ever. 

Today, after my hubby woke up with a fever (Calling him healed, in Jesus' name!), I decided to stay home from school myself to finish some late homework (that I didn't even fully complete...blah!) and take care of him. But I also wanted to just kind of...rest. A good friend of mine asked why we weren't at school, and when I told her Brent was sick and I was catching up because we were so busy, she lovingly called me out, reminding me that "opportunity is not obligation" and warning that with all we're doing, "if it doesn't eventually thin out, you'll burn out."

So true! I decided it was probably time to drop a bit of my volunteering (at least one out of four things), and just spend some time getting my home life and personal life organized...because both have been all over the place as of late! Not in any bad way particularly, but it's just been too busy!

Ain't that the truth! Why be so busy all the time, anyway? This life we live is for one purpose: LOVE. We are to love God, and love people...and love those people into the Kingdom, if they aren't already! Brent and I have never wanted a busy life, because we want to be free to serve God wholeheartedly and to serve people. It doesn't mean we won't have jobs or won't take care of ourselves or have fun. It doesn't mean we won't run errands, have places to go and people to see, and it doesn't mean we won't ever be in a hurry or get stressed out about this, that or the other. But we can do those things with JOY...and we can do those things in LOVE...and we can do things PEACEFULLY. (Yes! You can have a healthy stress level and still be at peace, because Peace Himself lives inside of you!)

Yesterday in class, one of my teachers shared this beautiful nugget of truth that was a total revelation to me, and yet it seemed so simple: anything that frustrates, irritates or annoys you is SELFISH. And it is. Unless it's a frustration with the enemy and the forces of darkness, you're only frustrated, irritated or annoyed because it interrupts YOUR plan, YOUR life, YOUR way of doing things, and so forth and so on. 

It is not about you. And it's not about me. It's about HIM, and it's about them: a lost and dying world that's going to hell if we as the Church don't up our game in the love department. 

And how can we even begin to better walk in love if we're so wrapped up in our own little busy lives? If we're always wrapped up in us, and what we're doing, what we have to do, what we're going through and what we have or what we need, at the end of the day, we're going to be inwardly focused and outwardly useless. Why? Because with that kind of thinking, we're bound to end up unnecessarily stressed about everything...because we think everything's about us.

But having said all of that, that doesn't mean we don't need to take time for ourselves. 

"It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, 

eating the bread of anxious toil; 

for He gives to His beloved sleep." Psalm 127:2

And let's not forget that God Himself took a rest after creating the entirety of the universe, and He instructed us to take a day of rest ourselves.

I need to refocus some of my energy and get some things on track (homework schedule, exercising regularly, planning healthy meals, being a good steward of our home, budgeting, and so forth...I even hate to admit it, but even regular time spent with God!) because the last couple months, we've [I've] let those things slip a bit...and when those things slip, it starts to affect other things too. I can't help others if I can't take care of myself. That's what that day of rest is for! 

And every so often, we may needs a few of those days in a row. 

Encouragement for Senioritis

This is how I feel right about now.

I'm trying to finish almost three weeks' worth of homework that I'm behind on, but I'm obviously writing this post. (Embarrassing, I know.) Now, I'm going to finish it all this weekend because I'm only four courses away from a bachelors degree and I do not plan on dropping below a C in this course, and have no desire to repeat any classes. I've been going to school off and on since I was 16 (which is now almost ten years, and equally as embarrassing as my horrid procratination!). I'm so very, very close to being finished, but unfortunately have a very, very bad case of senioritis. This senioritis (which isn't an actual disease, but I'm still pretty sure Christ died for all the same) is one of the three reasons I'm debating grad school. What are those reasons, you ask? Well, let me tell you.

1. Mental. I have no desire to enter my first year of grad school with senioritis. Goodness, that'd be awful beyond description. Not that I couldn't do it, but...why would I want to?
2. Money. My husband and I went from practically being debt free, save one medical bill, to having now both taken out school loans. While I'm not distraught about it, my goal is to eventually not have said debt. As much as I'd love to get my masters degree, I just don't want to take on a higher amount of debt.
3. Motherhood. While I have nothing against workin' mamas, neither I nor my hubby have any desire for me to be one when that time comes. (At least not until they're school agers, and even then...I might be homeschooling, so...you know. That might be tough.)

Now, there are plenty of pros to grad school, too, although none of which I'm going to consider at this moment because it hurts my brain. Time to get back to homework. However, before I go, I want to share some encouragement from Pastor Rick Warren from a devotional he wrote called "Why Do I Procrastinate?" - I found this very encouraging for today, and I hope it encourages you as much as it did me! Pastor Rick said, 

"The next time you find yourself procrastinating, 

stop and ask yourself why. 

Then ask God to help you overcome it 

so you can move forward and do what you need to do."

So simple and so true. 

Happy putting off procrastinating! Back to work...

A Working Woman No More!

Today, I officially put in my two-week notice for my job. I've wanted to for a while now, but haven't felt a peace about it until recently. I couldn't be more excited! One reason is simply that I've been way over-booked. I'm volunteering three days a week after school, doing an internship on Saturdays, volunteering every other Wednesday and Sunday at church, and I'm going to two different schools. I also have an apartment that needs cleaning and a husband that I enjoy spending time with.

My schedule's just a teeny bit full, if you can imagine.

But another reason is that I'm ready to devote 100% of my time to focusing on school (which includes the internship and the volunteering) and being a housewife. I'm so thankful that my husband has a job that allows him to attend school, provides benefits, and one that's placed him in a position of leadership where he can grow and be stretched. I'm so proud of him, and so thankful that God is our ultimate Provider!

Also, Brent and I have been wanting to exercise our faith more in the area of finances, and looking at our budget, it was something where we knew we could manage without me working, but it would definitely make things a lot tighter. However, we knew that it was time to start making that transition for a number of reasons. First, as I said, we want to put our hands to work, but we also want to exercise our faith more. Second, we've been desiring a more simple lifestyle just in general. Third, I've been way too overly stressed about my overbooked schedule, and work was at the bottom pf my priority list. And last, while I'm not opposed to working another job in the future, right now I'd really love to just be a student, a volunteer and a homemaker. (Plus, I'd love to devote a bit more time to my writing, as well!) I went from being someone who was not very faithful at keeping jobs to someone who, with the Lord's help, has grown immensely in the area of faithfulness. He's done so much in me, and I'm thankful to be where I'm at. I know I still have so much to learn, but I am pleased to say that I have finally, finally passed this test. (Thank you, Jesus!) But now, this is the season I'm in, and I'm ready to embrace it!

Brent and I are believers in traditional roles. While neither of us are opposed to women working, we both feel that for us right now, even without any children (though we're hoping that changes soon), it's best if I'm at home. Western society's way of thinking has tried to creep in, of course, telling me that as an able-bodied, childless twentysomething, I ought to be working a job. The thing is though, I will still be working. I just won't be earning a paycheck. In addition to being a student, I volunteer and I intern - all of which is putting my hand to something, and all of which I can "do as unto the Lord" just as much as I can a paid position. Not to mention, my husband is fulfilling what he's to do Biblically, and that is to work a job. (Besides, even Brent who works hard for us, doesn't really work for a paycheck. God is our ultimate Provider! Brent works yes, as the Bible instructs him to, but he works to be a blessing, and to put his hand to something. In doing so, he gives God something to work with, so to speak. But God always provides for our needs, and He still blesses us with the desires of our hearts!)

Speaking of, it's also easy to feel like I'm not contributing or that I'm making my husband do all the work, but that's just a lie from the enemy who's trying to make me feel lousy! We each fulfill roles, and we're happy to do it. My husband works, and I take care of the house. It doesn't matter that we don't have kids yet - there's still a home that needs managed! We feel in our place this way, and right now, we prefer it this way. Brent and I are A-OK with being a one-income household, and we are also A-OK with me holding a job in addition to his if I wanted to. (In fact, I probably will hold another job in the future.) But right now, neither of us want me to work a job, and so right now, I'm not going to. And we're so very, very happy about it.

In conclusion, here's an awesome testimony of God blessing us, and reminding me that me that leaving my job is the right thing right now...Just today, I was feeling a bit nervous about the whole thing. Despite the fact that I'm super excited about this new season, it's a leap of faith all the same. As we went over our budget, we realized that of course, we'd have to cut some things out of our spending and so forth. One of the things that came to my mind was an upcoming outing with our church's young marrieds group. I knew we'd have the money to go this time around, but I also "knew" it might be the last one for a while. Then I was reminded by the Lord that I'm trying to exercise my faith muscles, and believe more strongly for Him to provide in the area of our finances. Awesomely enough, a couple hours later, the leader of our young married group (who had no idea I was quitting my job - no one really knew) messaged me and Brent on Facebook, telling us that someone had anonymously chosen to pay for our tickets to the upcoming event! I was so blessed and honored, that God would use something so seemingly insignificant as tickets to a pumpkin patch to show me that He's got everything under control.

God is so very, very good!

Rain, Women & Correction

Right now it's cold, windy and rainy in Oklahoma...and I absolutely LOVE it! The only thing I don't love this that my husband is at work and not here to share such a perfect lounge-around-drink-coffee-in-pajamas day with me. But he works hard for us, and I love him for that.

I already haven't posted here as much as I would have liked to, but that's OK. Still figuring out some scheduling things. I've been a bit busy these last couple of weeks with year two of Bible school having just started a month ago, volunteering four days a week, my bachelors degree program continuing in full force (And me getting way behind in my homework too. Abnormal psychology...what's up with that?!), as well as some work-related stress.

But God's been so good to me. I've been blessed to have had some amazing moments with some of my girlfriends this last month - moments of encouragement and joy and bonding. I realize how very thankful I am for the ladies in my life! The world has bought the lie that women are catty and mean-spirited, but that's just not the case. Girls need each other, and we're to be an example to those around us. We need to lift one another up, and pray for one another, and be kind to those women who seem to be so unkind to us. 

As I mentioned, I was faced with a stressful work situation this past week. I won't go into the details, but it led me to have a moment of self-pity and frustration with not only a situation, but also with an individual. I remember silently complaining praying to the Lord about the situation, venting my frustration to Him about everything that had taken place, when all of a sudden, the Lord spoke these words to me: 

"I thought you said you wanted to live in a glass house."

I couldn't say anything. I just chuckled quietly, shut my tear-filled eyes, and shook my head. I had said that. Less than a week earlier, I had said that as my husband and I had both made the decision that we were going to live a life of intention and of purpose. We had decided that we were going to take on the "curse" of ministry that is living in a glass house and embrace it with joy and deliberateness. We were going to live with the constant pebble in our shoe that this life is never, not for one moment, about us; that it is always about others...always about the Kingdom...always about the lost being saved. 

I was then faced with a situation in which I had to come face to face with my own hypocrisy, and while that's not fun, it is good.

"...do not despise the chastening of the Lord, 

nor detest His correction; 

for whom the Lord loves He corrects..."

Psalm 3:11-12 (NKJV)

"If you endure chastening, God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom a father does not chasten? But if you are without chastening, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate and not sons. Furthermore, we have had human fathers who corrected us, and we paid them respect. Shall we not much more readily be in subjection to the Father of spirits and live? For they indeed for a few days chastened us as seemed best to them, but He for our profit, that we may be partakers of His holiness. Now no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless, afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it."

Hebrews 12:7-11 (NKJV)

Oddly enough, I enjoy getting corrected by the Lord. Not because I'm sadistic, but because I know that God loves me and wants me to be what He's made me to be: a vessel of honor. I know that God is proud of me when I obey and listen to His gentle, whispering voice that leads me closer to Him and His plan for my life.

I challenge you today: take a break from everything, and listen. Listen to that still, small voice on the inside, beckoning you to come a little bit closer, to go a little bit deeper, a tiny bit higher...what is the Holy One whispering to you right now? 

Listen to Him. He knows you like no other.